[Avodah] how to fix a mamzer

[Zev Sero via Avodah]

On 05/19/2016 04:26 AM, Eli Turkel via Avodah wrote:
> In the shiur of R Zilberstein last night he discussed the situation
> of a parent (usually father) who deserts a child in the hospital or
> even leaves the family.

> One case involved a father who showed up before the daughter's
> marriage and insisted that his name appear on the wedding invitation.
> R. Zilberstein paskened that the father who abandoned the family has
> absolutely no rights to anything. If the mother remarried then the
> adoptive father has the right to all decisions. Kibud Av ve-Em
> applies to the adoptive father and not the biological father that
> abandoned the family. Hakarot hatov is for the help of the adoptive
> family and biology contributes nothing.

Sorry, this is contrary to halacha. Kibbud av va'em is not connected to
hakarat hatov; it's a duty that one owes to ones parents *regardless* of
whether they did one good or bad. Even a mamzer owes his parents kibud,
although they did him the worst evil. Even Avraham Avinu, whose father
handed him over to be burned, owed him kibbud av.

An adoptive "parent" is only owed hakarat hatov (and kevod rabbo if he
taught him torah) and therefore is only owed it if he actually did good
and not bad. An abusive adoptive parent is owed nothing.

This is not subject to any machlokes, thus there is no room for different
opinions. Someone who says otherwise is simply wrong.


I found an answer to my speculation that a Jew's child by a shifcha might
be considered his child.   It's not so.  An eved has no yichus at all, not
even to his mother(!) let alone his father.


-- 
Zev Sero               Meaningless combinations of words do not acquire
zev at sero.name          meaning merely by appending them to the two other
                        words `God can'.  Nonsense remains nonsense, even
                        when we talk it about God.   -- C S Lewis