[Avodah] Noda b'Yehudah - How And When To Take Tzedaka From a Married Woman

[Prof. Levine]

Feminists will probably not like this. Furthermore, what if the wife 
is the main wage earner in a family, as is the case in many Kollel 
families, and yet she does not make the financial decisions in the home?

 From http://revach.net/article.php?id=1625

The Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 248:4) says that it is permitted to 
take a small amount of Tzedakah from a woman but if her husband 
protests it is forbidden to take anything from her. The Noda B'Yehuda 
says if a person who is very wealthy is not giving the requisite 
amount of Tzedakah for a person of his means, it is forbidden for the 
wife to try to make up for her husband's stinginess and give money on 
her own volition to Tzedakah.

Even if the wife is running the finances in the house it is forbidden 
for her to give Tzedakah if she knows that her husband is Makpid. If 
she does give Tzedakah it is forbidden to take the money from her. 
Even though Bais Din may force someone to give Tzedakah according to 
his means however the wife does not have the authority to do so on 
her own and anyone who takes money from her is stealing.

The Yad Avrohom (YD 248) brings from the Yam Shel Shlomo who seems to 
indicate that if the woman makes the financial decisions in the home 
then it is as if her husband made her a Shlucha and accepting from 
her even large donations is permitted.

Yitzchok Levine 
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