[Avodah] troubling halacha

[Zev Sero]

Micha Berger wrote:
> RET asks:
> :> According to RYBS and others, the purpose of aveilus is to give a
> :> constructive means of channeling the emotions of mourning.
> ...
> : According to this one should certainly tell an avel about his loss so
> : that he can experience this catharsis. That is why aveilim are so upset
> : when they are not told and cannot sit shiva with the family
> 
> 1- R' Zilberstein and the KSA needn't hold like RYBS.
> 
> 2- RYBS deduced lessons from halakhah pesuqah. Not decided halakhah
> based on taamei hamitzvos. If one holds like RYZ, one would deduce a
> different lesson.

The minhag is reconcilable with RYBS's reason too.  The longer the
person has been dead by the time the relative hears about it, the easier
it will be for them to accept it, and the shorter the mourning time they
will need.  We're told that after a year out of this world a person
begins to fade from others' memories, and the fact that Yaacov Avinu
continued to mourn for Yosef for 22 years proved that he was still alive.
It follows that if the person really is dead, and the news can be kept
from someone for a year, the memory will have begun to fade and the news
will hurt less.

Indeed, at least according to RYBS's explanation, this must surely be the
reason for the din that a shmua rechoka doesn't require sitting shiva.  


-- 
Zev Sero               Something has gone seriously awry with this Court's
zev at sero.name          interpretation of the Constitution.
                       	                          - Clarence Thomas