[Avodah] Wedding Attendance During Your Part of Sefira

[Zev Sero]

On 13/5/22 10:01, Micha Berger via Avodah wrote:
> On Thu, May 12, 2022 at 7:20pm EDT, Zev Sero wrote:
>> On 12/5/22 09:31, Prof. L. Levine via Avodah wrote:

>>> There was a time when the Kallah was brought to the men's side of the
>>> hall, she sat down next to her Chasan, and men danced in front of them.
>>> In many circles this is no longer done today.

>> In those circles where it is not done today it was never done.

> Seems the men danced before the kallah. Once can not say "in those circles
> ... it was never done". We all get our mesorah from Beis Hillel, no?

Not at all.  Where do you get the idea that this took place at anything 
analogous to "the men's side of the hall"?  In the gemara's time there 
was no hall and no "men's side".  I don't know exactly where this 
dancing took place, but my best guess is that it was at the nisu'in, 
what we would call the "chupah", though whether it took place under a 
canopy is anyone's guess.

What we would call the "chasunah" seems to have been a youth-only 
affair, with no adults invited, including the chosson's parents, let 
alone the kallah's.  From the gemara in Arvei Pesachim it seems to have 
taken place in some sort of tent in the chassan's parents' back yard, 
and to have consisted of the chassan's friends, who would stay all week, 
and presumably the kallah herself. I don't even know whether she was 
allowed to have any friends or relatives to keep her company, or what 
she was supposed to do with herself all week. Maybe she could take 
refuge in her in-laws' house when it got too much for her?  Nor do I 
know whether the friends would go home at night and come back, or sleep 
there, in which case what privacy arrangements were there for the 
newlyweds?  It's all very murky to me.

-- 
Zev Sero            Wishing you a healthy season appropriate
zev at sero.name       to your hemisphere