[Avodah] nichum aveilim

[Alexander Seinfeld]

>
>
>
>When one is physically distant from a friend who is sitting shiva, as a
>general rule, is it better to (pick one) call, text, or email during the
>shiva period? Or, is it better to wait until you actually see the person
>again?
>
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>See Igros Moshe OC IV:40.11, where he talks about nichum aveilim via the
>phone. It seems clear to me that he's saying that someone who is unable to
>visit in person still has a mitzvah of nichum; if so, then it makes sense
>to
>say that whatever of the modalities you suggest would create the most
>nechamah (and it may be different from person to person) should be the one
>used.

It seems to me the thrust of the question is, better to use technology
DURING shiva, or do it face-to-face AFTER shiva.

Therefore, since there is a special need for and mitzvah to be nichum
during shiva, one should pick up the phone and call, if you can get
through, and if not, send a message letting them know you tried to call,
AND ASLO repeat your words of comfort when you see them face-to-face,
since they are presumably still mourning for at least 30 days, if not 12
months.