[Avodah] kaddish yatom by non-mourner

Rich, Joel JRich at sibson.com
Thu Sep 20 12:07:42 PDT 2018


I don't think "finicky" is the correct translation.  "Lehakpid" means to 
be upset, to take offense.  Because this kaddish is associated with 
yetomim, to the point where we actually call it the "kaddish yatom", 
it's natural for parents to feel hurt at the thought of their child 
saying it.  Whether they should feel that way is not a halachic 
question, so it would never occur to anyone to ask it of a rav; nor 
would he have any halachic basis for answering it.  He ought to advise 
them to go to either a (Jewish and frum) counsellor or to a rebbe, 
depending on what kind of people they are.

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Interesting, since it says that one could say it unless the parent is makpid, then it is at some level a halachic question -what degree of hakpada would be required?  Also what percentage of the orthodox Jewish world today makes the differentiation between what is asked a "Rav" versus a "Rebbi"?  Another question - when one has 2 mitzvot in front of them, would it not be a halachic question which to give precedence to if all the standard measures are equal ?
GT
Joel Rich
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