[Avodah] Can a woman wear a wig if her mother did not?

[Prof. Levine]

At 01:05 PM 7/6/2011, Rn T. Katz wrote:
>My mother covers her hair with turban-type hats that fully cover her 
>hair  (not like the hats worn by women in some circles who permit 
>the showing of some  hair in front).  However, I have worn a sheitel 
>since I got  married.  There is no issue of hataras nedarim nor do 
>we have  matrilineal minhagim -- not patrilineal minhagim either, 
>for that matter, in the  case of a married woman. Is there such a 
>word as "virilineal"  -- husband-based?  I grew up in a home where 
>knaidlach were never  served at the seder but no one ever suggested 
>that I, when I married a  Litvak, had to do hataras nedarim before 
>eating knaidlach on Pesach.   As for keeping my mother's minhagim -- 
>there's no such thing.  I follow my  husband's minhagim, and that is 
>the norm. Even if your mother did make a vow not to wear a sheitel, 
>parents' vows are not binding on their children.  A nazir's children 
>do not have to refrain  from wine. However, I will mention one area 
>where there may possibly be a matrilineal  minhag, and that is 
>Shabbos candle lighting.  When I got married, I  was under the 
>impression that if your mother lights a candle for each child,  then 
>you, when you have your own home, should follow your mother's custom 
>in  this.  However, my husband said that you follow your 
>husband's  custom.  His custom (which technically then is my 
>mother-in-law's A'H  custom) is to light only two candles.  So that 
>is what I do.  If I  felt strongly about it, he probably wouldn't 
>mind my adding extra candles for  the children, but in the event I 
>have not done so.  I wonder what the  chevra here say about 
>candle-lighting -- mother's or mother-in-law's  minhag?  More than 
>with the issue of head-covering, I can see where people  might think 
>it goes according to the mother because candle-lighting is one 
>of  the three special mitzvos for women.  In contrast, issues of 
>tznius, what  to wear, fashion and head-covering, go according to 
>the community of which you  are part, and normally a wife is part of 
>her husband's community. --Toby Katz

I recall reading years ago about a newly married woman whose mother 
shaved her head and who wanted to do the same thing.  Her husband did 
not want her to do this.  Reb Moshe was asked and he replied, IIRC, 
(1) Shaving the head is an unsightly/inappropriate thing to do, and 
(2) a woman is supposed to follow the minhagim of her 
husband.  Hence, she should not shave her head. YL



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