[Avodah] Hilchos Aveilus (was Children at a Wedding)

[rabbirichwolpoe at gmail.com]

Micha:
> Hilkhos Aveilus are wonderful that way. They remove from the aveil
> thedecision of what is "enough" or "appropriate" to do for their
> parent'smemory by giving him  standard to follow.

I have to concur with Micha

When my Dad obm was niftar I did not know what to do
Out of sense of shock

But realizing that halachah dictated many parameters gave me a sense
of solace. I surrendered to the halachos and just did them out of sense
of filial duty w/o having to weigh the pros and cons

I was very grateful for halachah p'suqah taking over during a time of
crisis and confusion

You see that my father was niftar motzo'ei Shabbos erev Sukkos; I was in
NYC, he in Hartford, CT there were many considerations for logisitics.
Too many to list completely. One is that despite being Shat"z, no way
could I return from the levaya before YT.

And this could have deferred the levayah, [among another bunch of reasons]
but we did not.

So I got a substitute Shatz and sailed to Hartford and followed the
halachah and the minhaggim - usually in consultation with a Rov.

KT
RRW
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