[Avodah] minhag simchat tora

[Saul.Z.Newman at kp.org]

a blog not normally allowed here lists the following as 'shtick'
done on simchat tora. any additions?

 1. High Holiday tune for the first Maariv*
 2. Show tunes, or old standards, for the Chazan's part of Maariv.
 3. Auctioning off every honor of the day* to the highest bidder
 4. The gabbai calling someone up to read a verse of Ata Haraysa by
    his profession ("Mechubid HaCaterer Hagodol")
 5. The gabbai calling someone up to read a verse of Ata Haraysa by
    reciting the verse himself ("Mechubid HaCaterer Hagodol mit de
    posuk hashem melech hashem molach hashem yimloch l'olam voed")
 6. Completely removing the mechitza during hakafot*
 7. Putting a shtreimal on the person leading the hakafa* (You don't
    usually wear a shtrimal and a talis simultaneously, but the joke
    has more bite (not that its all that funny in any case) if the
    person being forced to don the shtreimal isn't hasidic)
 8. Blocking the torah's return to the ark after hakafos*
 9. Reading the torah at night to the High Holiday tune (Everywhere I
    know does this all day, too)*
10. Someone taking an aliya and reciting the blessings using the
    "wrong" accent or pronunciation. (in a shtiebel the joke is to use
    a sing-song for asher notan lonu torat emet; in a Young Israel the
    joke is mumbling Borchee es heshem hamivoyrach and putting the
    accent on the wrong syllable of the word torah.)*
11. The reverse hagbah at maariv (Some do it all day, too)*
12. "Young Israel" tunes for Aleinu or Kaddish (Shteibles only)*
13. Funny hats (I've seen cowboy hats, bucharin kippot, and fezes,
    among others)
14. A shachris chazan in a formal cantors uniform
15. Singing parts of shachris not normally sung, usually to out of
    context tunes (ie modernisha tunes in a shteible, hasidic melodies
    in a big shul)*
16. Kids running around tying talitot together
17. Lubovitch style duchaning (in non Lubovitch shuls)
18. Stealing the kohens' shoes
19. Calling up any boy who can read for an aliyah*
20. Singing hamalach hagoel at kol nearim*
21. Singing wedding tunes at chosan Torah and Berayshis.*
22. Screaming out vayihi erev vayihi boker yom X in advance of the
    Torah reader.*
23. Screaming out "Boreh Pri Hagofen" when the Torah reader reaches
    Yom Hashishi
24. Neilah tunes at musaf
25. Abuse of the baal musaf, including: tying him up, carrying him
    out, spinning him around, and dousing him with water at the prayer
    for rain.
26. Someone making a mezonos or shehakol blessing with the tune used
    for the kohen's blessing at the moment in musaf when that prayer
    would normally be said on an ordinary holiday

* =  done this year in his temple