[Avodah] Kaddish Yasom

[Daniel Israel]

Cantor Wolberg wrote:
> On a related topic, a good friend of mine, an O. musmach lost his  
> father and there were many O. rabbis at the levaya.
> He was told (contrary to what many feel is proper) that it was not  
> kovodik for a son to shovel earth, so he refrained from
> what he thought was correct. Up until he told me that, I always  
> encouraged children to participate in the mitzvah. Has
> anyone ever heard of this minhag or halacha?

I was told to not participate in the actual shoveling at my father's 
levayah.  I was very moved by the fact that, although most of the people 
there were not frum and were unused to filling in the grave themselves, 
they all willingly finished the job.

-- 
Daniel M. Israel
dmi1 at cornell.edu