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<DIV><FONT style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: transparent" color=#000000 size=2
face=Arial>From: "Prof. Levine" <llevine@stevens.edu><BR><BR>From
http://revach.net/article.php?id=1529<BR><BR>Although they are technically not
related or considered family, Rav <BR>Moshe Shternbuch says (3:374) that if an
adopted child grew up with <BR>his step parents and considered them to be his
parents he should sit <BR>Shiva and keep all halachos of Aveilus upon their
death....<BR>------------------------------<BR><BR>From: Micha Berger <A
href="mailto:micha@aishdas.org">micha@aishdas.org</A><BR></FONT></DIV>
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<DIV><FONT style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: transparent" color=#000000 size=2
face=Arial>Linguistic issue: An adoptive parent is (usually) not a step parent.
An<BR>adoptive parent is a parent....</FONT></DIV>
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<DIV><FONT style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: transparent" color=#000000 size=2
face=Arial><BR>....The adjective is instead put on the genetic parents who do
not raise the<BR>child. These are "birth parents", to distinguish them from the
adoptive,<BR>ie real parents, the ones who raise the child.<BR><BR>To quote R'
Meir Simcha haKohen miDvinsk, MC Devarim 28:61 (tr mine):<BR> Even
his creation on the physical level, we find in the Torah<BR> that
it is for the intent of his preserving the species on a<BR>
spiritual level. <BR>-- <BR>Micha
Berger
<BR></FONT></DIV>
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<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>>>>>>></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>I'm glad that RMB clarified an important point, namely,
that adoptive parents are not the same as step parents!</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>I would be interested in knowing whether R' Sternbuch's
answer assumes that the adoptive child was born to goyim and was converted to
Judaism by his adoptive parents. Would he give a different answer if
the adoptive child was born to Jewish parents? Would the child have to sit
shiva for /both/ his adoptive and his birth parents (assuming he knew when his
birth parents died)? To further subdivide that last question: would
he have to sit shiva for his birth parents if he had never met them? Or
would he only have to sit shiva for his birth parents if he /had/ met
them? Or would he not have to sit shiva for them if he'd met them but he
never had any parent-child relationship with them? </FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>If his adoptive father or mother died, would it be
improper for him to say kaddish for his adoptive parents while both his birth
parents were still alive? To stay in shul for Yizkor? Conversely, if
his birth parent died first, would it be improper for him to say kaddish and say
Yizkor for the birth parent while the parents who raised him were still
alive?</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>Skipping along to another, tangentially related
question: does an adopted child have a chiyuv of kibud av ve'em to his
adoptive parents? Does he get a reward of long life? Does he have a
chiyuv of kibud av ve'em towards his birth parents? Does he have to seek
them out in order to fulfill this mitzva? </FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>-----</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000>In regard to "preserving the species on a spiritual
level" I will quote myself from an Ask the Rabbi column I wrote in 2007 in
answer to a question about childlessness. (I'm not sure but I think I'm
the only female "rabbi" there at jewishanswers.org)<BR></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><A
href="http://www.jewishanswers.org/ask-the-rabbi-category/womens-issues/?p=2638">http://www.jewishanswers.org/ask-the-rabbi-category/womens-issues/?p=2638</A></DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>--begin quote--</DIV>
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<DIV>
<P>It was Richard Dawkins who coined the term “memes” to describe little bits of
knowledge and information and ideas and emotions that are passed from one person
to another. He’s an atheist who is quite wrong-headed in other respects, but
this idea of his has great merit. It is not only our genes that we seek to pass
on, but our memes. A lower level, ignorant person may have no memes, only genes,
but an intelligent and educated and thoughtful person has a vast treasury of
memes to pass on, ideas and feelings and talents and areas of knowledge. There
are many ways to do this, from writing to teaching to being a good friend and
listener. Our genes we can pass on only to our biological children, but our
memes we can pass on to unlimited numbers of other people.</P>
<P> </P>
<P>--end quote--</P></DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT color=#000000><FONT color=#0000ff></FONT><BR><FONT
color=#0000ff><STRONG>--Toby
Katz<BR>=============</STRONG></FONT><BR></FONT><FONT color=#0000ff>Romney --
good values, good family, good
hair<BR><BR><BR>-------------------------------------------------------------------
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