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<FONT size=2 face=Tahoma><B>From:</B> avodah-bounces@lists.aishdas.org
[mailto:avodah-bounces@lists.aishdas.org] <B>On Behalf Of </B>Joseph C.
Kaplan<BR></FONT></DIV>
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<DIV> and my reaction, after reading all the posts was, in typical Jewish
fashion, a question: why should there be any minhag at all? There are so
many differing factors that are relevant in trying to do the best thing for
both the children and the marrying couple;<SPAN class=468590706-02112009><FONT
color=#0000ff size=2 face=Arial> </FONT></SPAN></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=468590706-02112009></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=468590706-02112009><FONT color=#0000ff size=2 face=Arial>On
the contrary. Would you be able to tell your child "Sorry, you can't come to
my wedding. My new husband/wife doesn't like you/may not like you/feels
uncomfortable with you around/may feel uncomfortable with you around,
etc."</FONT></SPAN></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=468590706-02112009><FONT color=#0000ff size=2
face=Arial></FONT></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=468590706-02112009><FONT color=#0000ff size=2 face=Arial>Much
better to have a fixed minhag. Sorry kid, you can't come, that's the
minhag!</FONT></SPAN></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=468590706-02112009><FONT color=#0000ff size=2
face=Arial></FONT></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=468590706-02112009><FONT color=#0000ff size=2
face=Arial>Akiva</FONT></SPAN></DIV></BLOCKQUOTE></BODY></HTML>