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<DIV> R'n CL writes:</DIV>
<BLOCKQUOTE
style="PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: blue 2px solid"><FONT
style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: transparent" face=Arial color=#000000
size=2>>>If you understand the halacha in the Shulchan Aruch this way
then the Rema<BR>is in fact coming to say, but in the case of male children,
even if you<BR>think that in many ways the child might be better off not
knowing, the<BR>minhag is still to tell them, so they can say kaddish
(remember that kaddish<BR>is regarded as an obligation which assists the meis,
especially when said by<BR>a son, so there is reason to say that even if it is
not so good for the<BR>son's mental welfare to be told, he must still be told
for the good of the<BR>meis). Such a calculation would not however apply
to daughters or other<BR>close relatives.<<<BR></FONT></BLOCKQUOTE></DIV>
<DIV>>>>>><BR>Something I have wondered about for years:
Does an adopted child, who knows that his birth parents are Jewish, have an
obligation to seek them out 1) in order to fulfill kibud av va' eim
2) in order to know when they pass away 3) and does he have to sit shiva for
them when they pass away? And: if his birth parents are
still alive when his adoptive parents pass away, may he sit shiva for his
adoptive parents? Say kaddish for them? Does he have to get
permission from his bio parents to do so? (Coming back to my starting
question:) Does he have to maintain some kind of contact with his birth parents
in order to get that permission if needed?</DIV>
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<DIV><FONT lang=0 face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2 FAMILY="SANSSERIF"
PTSIZE="10"><STRONG></STRONG><BR><B>--Toby
Katz<BR>=============<BR><BR></B><BR></FONT></DIV></FONT><BR><BR><BR><DIV CLASS="aol_ad_footer" ID="d4d5ecfc39e3f4a753dca176c1fb5c4b"><FONT style="color: black; font: normal 10pt ARIAL, SAN-SERIF;"><HR style="MARGIN-TOP: 10px"><a href="http://pr.atwola.com/promoclk/100000075x1212774565x1200812037/aol?redir=http://toolbar.aol.com/moviefone/download.html?ncid=emlcntusdown00000001">Get the Moviefone Toolbar</a>. Showtimes, theaters, movie news & more!</FONT></DIV></BODY></HTML>