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<DIV> In the United States, the general custom I observed at
religious funerals was to have <U>all</U> family members (male and female) go
through the shura together which was made up of men and women. At my first
funeral in Israel ca 1974, I noted that the Chevra Kadisha instructed only the
men to make a shura for only the male mourners. I asked the head of the
Chevra Kadisha and he indicated that that's what is found in Rav
Tackatchinsky's Gesher haChaim. Indeed, Rav Tuckachinsky indicates
that that was Minhag Eretz Yisrael, but he also notes that women don't go to
Funerals at all (Based on a Zohar in Pekudai the the Satan is Meraked).
Needless to say, the women mourners of our Anglo Saxon community in Rehovot
were very hurt and offended, especially since all knew that the Minhag in the
Galut was otherwise.</DIV>
<DIV> I then consulted with Rav Simcha Kook, Chief rabbi of
Rehovot. On the one hand, he didn't want to contravene the Minhag of the Chevra
Kadisha; on the other hand, he understood that the women needed the communal
Nihum Aveilum. We agreed that the men would make a shura for the men and
the women for the women. It took a few times for me to teach the women of
our community what to do and what to say, but it now occurs without my
intervention. When someone is buried at Eretz haChaim Cemetery near Beit
Shemesh, the same happens. The head of the Chevra Kaddisha makes his
announcement (Men for men), and - if the family wants it - we make sure
there is women's shura for the women. At Eretz haChaim Cemetery they also don't
have women Eulogizing. I spoke openly with the head of the Chevra Kaddisha and
he indicated that after they leave, "we can do as we like." So I
arrange for the women to speak at the kever then.</DIV>
<DIV> As far as keriah is concerned, women are Hayyavot just
like men. In Eretz Yisrael, one of the women (often from the Chevra Kaddisha)
helps the aveilot with the keriah and berakha, as do the men for the men.</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>--------------------------------------------------------<BR>Dr. Aryeh A.
Frimer<BR>Chemistry Dept., Bar-Ilan University<BR>Ramat Gan 52900,
ISRAEL<BR>E-mail: <A
href="mailto:FrimeA@mail.biu.ac.il">FrimeA@mail.biu.ac.il</A><BR>
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