[Avodah] My Current Futile Life Project

[Akiva Miller]

.
Y'all had some pretty good ideas, but MY Current Futile Life Project is to
find a Chumash publisher who will give reasonable instructions for unusual
haftaras. I'm just a guy in shul. I might remember whether this is a leap
year or not, but without a luach in my hand, I have no idea whether *next*
week is a double parsha or not.

There's no such thing as "Haftara for Parshas Mattos". If Divrei Yirmiyahu
would be labeled as "Haftara for the first Shabbos of the Three Weeks", it
would not need any other instructions at all. But if you look in your
Chumash you'll probably find several sentences describing leap years, and
whether Matos and Masei are read together or not.

Likewise, "Haftara for Pinchas" should be renamed as "Haftara for Pinchas
when it is before 17 Tammuz" or "... before the Three Weeks".

Similarly for Vayelech and Haazinu. Even if someone is a Mechalel Shabbos,
if his Judaism is strong enough to bring him to shul on Shabbos morning,
then he almost surely knows whether Rosh Hashana was last week or next
week. Rename "Shuva" as "Haftara for the Shabbos between Rosh Hashana and
Yom Kippur", and be done with it.

There are many other instructions which can be similarly simplified. I'd
gladly produce a full list - for free! - if I thought any publisher would
actually use it.

Akiva Miller
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