[Avodah] Binfol oyvecha

[Akiva Miller]

.
About 15-20 years ago, we had several discussions about the minhag of
removing wine from our cups at the Seder. To find those discussions - which
spanned several different volumes of Avodah, and under several different
Subject lines, please go to the alphabetical index at
https://aspaqlaria.aishdas.org/avodah/getindex.cgi?section=B and look for
the word "binfol".

At the time, I understood that the reason for removing the wine is based on
the pasuk "binfol oyvekha al tismach" - we rejoice over Yetzias Mitzraim,
but at the same time, we must tone down that joy, because of our sadness
that the Mitzrim suffered in the process.

Some of the chevrah had a different view, though, and they claimed that we
do NOT have to lessen our joy; that pasuk only refers to *Jewish* enemies.
I did not find those arguments convincing.

I want to thank R' Joel Rich for his Audio Roundup 2024:22, in which he
linked to this shiur from Rabbi Eli Reich of Sha'alvim:
https://www.yutorah.org/lectures/1098499 (44 minutes long)

In this shiur, Rabbi Reich presents both sides of this argument, and in my
opinion, he did so rather fairly. However (spoiler alert!) he ended up
coming down *against* using that pasuk to explain this minhag, and in fact,
he came down against restraining our joy at all. I found his explanation to
be clear and convincing, and I plan to listen to it again, several times,
not while driving but at my desk where I can write notes, and figure out
how I am going to explain this to my family next Pesach.

If anyone else wants to open their mind to this idea, the link, again, is
at https://www.yutorah.org/lectures/1098499

(In addition, I must thank RJR in general, for *all* his Audio Roundups. It
is a great selection of shiurim, and I have listened to many of them when I
commute to work. It turns a nerve-wracking drive to a mitzva-filled one.)

Akiva Miller
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