[Avodah] Sim Sholom at a shiva house

[Zev Sero via Avodah]

On 04/06/2015 08:13 AM, Kenneth Miller via Avodah wrote:
> R' Zev Sero asked:
>
>> Nusach Ashkenaz says Sim Sholom only after birchas cohanim (and in
>> EY after kriyas hatorah), and Sholom Rov at other times. Does this
>> mean that at a shiva house Sholom Rov is said even in shacharis
>> (in EY on a non-Mon/Thu)?


> No, but I don't know why.
>
> I never thought of that question before, but here is a
> possibly-related question that I've wondered for years: If Shir
> Hamaalos is said whenever we skip Tachanun, should it always be said
> at the shiva house?


The same question would apply in the afternoon of Erev Tish`a B'av.
But the two questions can easily be distinguished.  The substitution of
Shir Hamaalos for Al Naharos Bavel is not caused by the lack of tachanun;
rather both are caused by the same thing: the element of simcha on that
day that makes mourning inappropriate.  But the omission of tachanun
at a shiva house is not because of simcha, but because we don't want to
invoke divine judgment in a situation which is already fraught; thus Al
Naharos Bavel is not inappropriate.  And of course on Erev Tish`a B'av
what could be more appropriate than Al Naharos Bavel?

Sim Shalom, however, seems (in nusach Ahskenaz) to be directly linked to
the conclusion of birchas kohanim, "veyasem lecha shalom".  Thus it shouldn't
matter why birchas kohanim is not being said; the mere fact that it's
not said should be enough to cause the omission of sim shalom, and the
substitution of shalom rav.

Proof that this distinction is valid comes from the case of Tehilim #49,
which is said at a shiva house on days when tachanun is said; on days
when tachanun is omitted, #16 is substituted.  But of course in a shiva
house *every* day is a day when tachanun is omitted, so when does one say
#49?  The obvious answer is that on normal days omission of tachanun is
related to the place, not to the day, and thus #49 is said; when the day
has an element of simcha that makes #49 inappropriate, we substitute #16.



-- 
Zev Sero               I have a right to stand on my own defence, if you
zev at sero.name          intend to commit felony...if a robber meets me in
                        the street and commands me to surrender my purse,
                        I have a right to kill him without asking questions
                                               -- John Adams