[Avodah] God who knows the future

[T613K at aol.com]

From: "kennethgmiller at juno.com" _kennethgmiller at juno.com_ 
(mailto:kennethgmiller at juno.com) 
.

I  wrote:

> Similarly, if a woman is not pregnant, or is in the  beginning
> stages of her pregnancy, it is perfectly okay to pray for  the
> gender of the child. While it is true that Hashem *does*  know
> what gender the child will end up being, He has not yet - so  to
> speak - made this decision. There is still time to pray and
>  influence this future choice of His. At some point in the
> pregnancy (40  days, IIRC) He will make that decision, based on
> whatever factors He  uses for this sort of thing, at which point
> the child's gender will not  be an undecided thing that one may
> pray for, but it will be an  accomplished fact, which no one may
> pray for (except for those tzadikim  who are allowed to pray for
> miracles, which this would be).

I was  asked why I made this distinction between the early and late stages 
of  pregnancy, and specifically where I got this shiur of "40 days". After 
all, the  Mishna (Brachos 54a) and Rambam (Brahos 10:22) simply say that this 
prayer must  not be said then the wife is pregnant. Whence this exception 
for early  pregnancy?

The source seems to be the Tur OC 230, who writes, "... but  davka after 40 
days of pregnancy. But within 40 days, his tefilah is effective."  The MB 
(230:1) explains, "Because the shape of the newborn will have been  formed; 
but witin 40 days, tefilah is effective." ......

Akiva  Miller
 

>>>>
 
Leah davened for Dina to be a girl and not a boy so that Rochel wouldn't be 
 left with just one son/one shevet (they knew there were going to be 12  
shevatim).  Somebody (Rashi?) says that's why whenever the Torah refers  to 
Dina it spells the word "na'arah" defective, with the final heh missing,  so 
it can be read "na'ar."  (Although I've noticed that strangely, the word  
"na'arah" is /always/ spelled without a final heh throughout the Chumash! --  
IIRC)  
 
I also heard or read somewhere that because Dina was supposed to be a boy  
and changed to a girl, she was infertile.  (Which I realize contradicts a  
midrash that she did have a child, "Shaul ben haCanaanis.")
 
In terms of our current knowledge of when it's too late to change the  
fetus' gender, we now know that would be as soon as the sperm and the egg  
combine.  Before we had this knowledge, davening during pregnancy might  have 
been effective, but now that we have this knowledge, we can't daven during  
pregnancy anymore because it would be asking for the impossible, like the  
forbidden prayer when one hears that there was a fire, "Please don't let it be  
my house that burned" -- a prayer to change the past, which cannot work.
 
Rarely, a baby is born who is externally one gender though his/her  ch
romosomes are of the other gender, but those children usually have messed up  or 
mixed up internal organs and cannot reproduce.  So davening to "change  the 
past" might just be effective in messing the baby up.  So the best  thing 
would be /not/ to daven for a sex change at any time in pregnancy, but  only 
to daven for a baby of the desired sex /before/ the Mrs. goes to the mikva  
or when it is definitely sure that she is not yet pregnant.  You can also  
daven during pregnancy something like this, "Please grant that this baby be  
healthy and normal, whatever sex it is, and that my /next/ baby be a boy."
 



--Toby Katz
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