[Avodah] minhagei 9 av

[Micha Berger]

On Thu, Jul 22, 2010 at 10:43:56AM +0300, Akiva Blum wrote:
: > justified the frequent use of siyumim to
: > offer fleishig dinners. After all, he said, what can better heal the
: > damage of sin'as chinam than people joining together to 
: > celebrate another Jew's completion of a seifer?

: Seuda hamesfekes must be eaten sitting alone. Apparently the atmosphere
: we wish to create is not one of comradery.

Or in twos. The desire is to avoid a machloqes whether three who sit
together for se'udah hamafseqes should make a zimun or not. See SA OC
552:8.

The Tur gives a different reason besheim the Rosh, that it's to promote
thinking about the churban rather than chatting. The BY quotes Rabbeinu
Meshulam who invokes "yeisheiv badad viyidom".
Pretty much what RAB wrote. But:

1) That's bedavqa for the ShM because it's the ShM and part of the
aveilus, so it doesn't contradict RMMonk's thought (caveat: as I remember
it 30 years later), and

(2) We don't hold like the Rosh's shitah which would imply bedavqa being
alone, we hold like the SA in possibly sitting with one more male.

(Questions about women and zimun and what it means for ShM left as an
excercise to the reader. <grin>)

Tir'u baTov!
-Micha

-- 
Micha Berger             None of us will leave this place alive.
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