[Avodah] Gra on men taking care of babies

[Rich, Joel]

In the thread titled "biography of R. Elyashiv", R' Zev Sero quoted a post which R' Ben Waxman posted on Areivim:

> The Gra writes in his perush on Pirke Avot that if someone hears his 
> baby cry at night, he should ignore him and let his wife take care of 
> the baby. Either the man is learning or sleeping in order to learn. 
> Either way, the baby's problems are not his concern.

I am SHOCKED by this. If the Gra (or anyone else) would say such a thing, surely they would point out that it only refers to people who never interrupt their learning for any other mitzva.

And even if so, to say that "the baby's problems are not his concern" seems absurd. Maybe his learning takes priority over his child's pain, but to say that he should not be concerned seems cruel.

Can someone tell me where this appears?

Akiva Miller

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Interesting that this email appeared just a few hours prior to the announcement of the ptirah af R' Y Amital ZT"L of Yeshivat Har Etzion.
YHE's values have been epitomized as described by him :

When Yeshivat Har Etzion was first established, I was asked what would be special about our yeshiva. I related the story told about Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi (the Admor ha-Zaken), author of the Tanya, who was once studying Torah in his room, when all of a sudden, he heard his infant grandson, the future author of the Tzemach Tzedek, crying in his cradle. The Rebbe closed his Gemara, went into the baby's room and soothed him back to sleep. He then went into the adjoining room, where he found his son, the baby's father (known as the "middle Rebbe"), steeped in Torah study. The Rebbe turned to his son in astonishment and asked: "Why didn't you get up to pacify your crying son?" 

The bewildered son looked up and answered: "I was so immersed in my study that I didn't even hear him cry." 

The Rebbe then declared: "If someone is studying Torah, and fails to hear the crying of a Jewish baby, there is something very wrong with his learning." 

This has been the message of our yeshiva from its very establishment: to be attentive to the crying child, in the widest sense of "crying" - that is to say, to be alert to the needs of the Jewish people.


Yehi Zichro Baruch and may we all be consoled by this Tisha B'Av being a Yom Tov,

Joel Rich
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