[Avodah] Tzeni'us and gender roles

[Chana Luntz]

RMB writes:

> See the Keli Yaqar Shemos 30:
>     ... ein kaparah zu meshameshes ki im bizman shekol echad yosheiv
>     besokh ami kemo she'amerah haShunamis...
> Or the Tzitz Eliezer XVI:35, who uses besokh ami to argue 
> that it's better (yeish to'eles yoseir) to make one tefillah 
> for numerous neshamos rather than single out one at a time.

The Tzitz Eliezer is clearly talking about a different value than the one
you are arguing for.  It is indeed a common feature in yehadus that we link
our suffering to that of other Jews.  Hence we console aveilim amongst the
mourners of Zion and Jerusalem and we daven for the sick amongst the sick of
Israel. The idea that it would be better to make one tefillah for numerous
neshamos rather than single out one at a time fits squarely within this
model.   It is also at one with the idea that tephilos are always heard in a
congregation, when they may not be heard if prayed by an individual.
Indeed, while I am no Zohar scholar, that seems to me to be what the Zohar
that the Tzitz Eliezer quotes is specifically referring to - at the time
that HKBH is called HaMelech HaMishpat, and there is judgment hanging over
the world, a person should not separate himself and try and go it alone -
and it is this aspect that it finds a remez in the pasuk besoch ami (I can
understand that reading of besoch ami, although while this idea of not
separating oneself from the community is one that is not uncommon in the
halachic literature, for some reason eg the gemora does not seem to use
bsoch ami to illustrate this point - perhaps because, as you will no doubt
point out, it does not seem to be the pshat in what the Shunamis was saying,
as there seemed to be no question of prishus in what was on offer).  What is
not being discussed here is any idea about the taking or not taking of
public roles in front of a community, rather the motif is the joining
together with, rather than the separating oneself from, the community when
faced with HaShem's judgment.

But you are arguing for something else.  If we took a similar scenario to
that discussed by the Tzitz Eliezer, ie a group of chollim (where the same
discussion about having one prayer for numerous cholim, or having separate
tefillos could be made), your argument as a consequence would seem to go as
follows:  If one cholleh had the opportunity to be cured, he or she ought to
refuse that opportunity, unless all of the community of chollim could be so
cured.  Because, according to you, being besoch ami is both an ideal and it
means that a person should not seek to differentiate themselves from others
in the community.  Of course that is absolutely not what the Tzitz Eliezer
or the Zohar is saying, not about chollim, or about the neshamos that we are
davening should be elevated, or about people facing the yom hadin.   I am
fully confident that the Tzitz Eliezer would expect the person davening to
be truly grateful if even one of the neshamos being davenned for were
elevated to greater heights in olam haba, even if some of the others were
left behind.

Regards

Chana