[Avodah] Fwd (rbh at sympatico.ca): Insight 5768-34: Teaching Personality

[Micha Berger]

On Mon, Jul 14, 2008 at 11:13 EDT, I forwarded from RBHecht:
: Rabbi Yisroel Chait, the Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Bnei Torah, poses
: a most fascinating yet bewildering question [1] that I continue to
: find difficult to answer: how does one truly get through to a ba'al
: gaiva, an inherently haughty person, that he/she should not be a ba'al
: gaiva? Of course, it is possible to teach and, perhaps more importantly,
: to motivate such a person to act humbly but that is precisely the Rosh
: Yeshiva's point. If one looks at many of the sources within the Torah
: literature in this regard, such as, for example, Avot 1:13 [2] one finds
: arguments that contend that the method by which one receives honour is
: by not seeking honour-but is the ultimate aim still not honour? ...

: The answer may be that the goal is simply to change behaviour, that
: it is not truly possible to change the yardstick...

I do not share this pessimism. A mitzvah implies the obligation to change
one's personality to fit the values implied by it. Even according to
the Rambam, who limits this idea to mitzvos sichlios, it would apply to
someone with a ruach rechavah.

R' Yisrael Salanter gives a three step process to curing a midah:

1- Hargashah, being aware that something needs correcting, and when you
are doing it.
2- Kibush hayeitzer: acting despite the desire
and this naturally will lead to
3- Tiqun hayeitzer: the desire will take care of itself.

It's straight na'aseh venishmah, listening as a consequence of one's
actions. Ha'adam nif'al lefi pe'ulaso, as the Chinukh would put it.

IOW:
1- Get the person to be intellectually aware of the proper yardstick,
   and motivated to do something about it
2- Encourage progressively acting more and more according to that new
   yardstick
and
3- The yardstick will change in-and-of itself.

Tir'u baTov!
-Micha

-- 
Micha Berger             The mind is a wonderful organ
micha at aishdas.org        for justifying decisions
http://www.aishdas.org   the heart already reached.
Fax: (270) 514-1507