[Avodah] Your brother's a Mumar; here's the solution!

[Joshua Meisner]

On Wed, Jul 9, 2008 at 3:39 PM, Micha Berger <micha at aishdas.org> wrote:
>
>
> R' Joshua Meisner Sent: Monday, July 07, 2008 2:21 PM
> : Michal bas Shaul, although technically it was before she married him
> (Sh"A
> : 18:20).
>
> On Mon, Jul 07, 2008 at 08:19:28PM -0400, R Stuart Feldhamer wrote:
> : Great example - see Sh"B 6:16 : )
>
> A marriage with no anger and fighting isn't a healthy marriage.
>
> I used this idea to explain Avraham's argument with the RBSO WRT Sedom,
> and Moshe's battle to save Kelal Yisrael. I suggested that even when it
> comes to the RBSO, He expects a real relationship from us. And since
> we're human beings, that includes times of anger and argument.


RSF is correct that Michal is likely the only woman in Tanach to feel
bizayon towards her husband, but I don't believe that the two pesukim
provide an absolute contrast (whether or not that was the point being made
by RSF, it was a point that I, myself, have made more than once in the
past).  The opposite of ahavah is not bizayon, but sin'ah.  Bizayon is not
hatred (despite JPS' translation of despise); it's belittlement.

The love that Michal felt for her father's hero need not be counterindicated
by the bizayon she felt towards her husband, the king.  Indeed, it may
precisely have been her powerful love for David that caused her to be so
hurt by her feeling that David was wronging himself by his
self-degradation.  This being the case, the argument between Michal and
David need not have been tainted by anger (although I suppose it depends on
how one defines anger).

Kol tuv,

Joshua
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