[Avodah] Birkas Erusin

[kennethgmiller at juno.com]

Baruch shekivanti!

On the occasion of my daughter's wedding about 18 hours from now, I'd like to share a thought which I've had for a long time, but could find no support for until a few minutes ago.

I've heard it said that the Birkas Erusin is a Birkas Shevach, praising Hashem about marriage. But to me, the text never seemed to fit that explanation. It certainly starts off like a Birkas Hamitzvah. But which mitzvah would it be? From the situation in which it is said, one might think it to be on the mitzvah of getting married. But if so, the wording is very odd.

> ... Who sanctified us with His mitzvos
> and commanded us about forbidden relations
> and forbade to us the arusos
> and permitted to us those who married us with
>   chupah and kiddushin...

I've always suspected that this bracha is a Birkas Hamitzva, but an unusual one in that it is on a Lav rather than an Aseh. Specifically, on the prohibition of relations with a woman who a merely his arusah, and not his full-fleged nesuah.

But how can we have a Birkas Hamitzvah on a prohibition? It is unheard of! Yes, I'll concede that this is the only such brachah. But this is also a very unusual prohibition. All other prohibitions apply from the time we were first obligated in mitzvos, or they apply at certain times of the day or year, and are clock/calendar dependent. As such, the concept of Over Laasiyasan sort of doesn't apply, making the bracha a no-go.

In contrast, this prohibition does not apply at all. And then, a person can do a certain act which brings the prohibition into force - namely, kiddushin. And then, by abstaining from the prohibited act, he is fulfilling the mitzvah. (Yes, he is fulfilling it via Shev V'Al Taaseh, but cut me some slack, okay?) Such a convergence of criteria is not met by any other prohibition. (Maybe a neder would be similar; I don't know if one makes a bracha on a neder. Early Kabalas Shabbos or Kabalas Yom Kipur could also count, but it would be weird making a bracha on the optional acceptance of something that would be automatic in another hour anyway.)

And then, a few minutes ago, I found a source which (if I'm reading it correctly) says exactly the same things as I've written above.

In the Siddur Otzar Hatefilos, the perush Etz Yosef says the following on the words "v'asar lanu es haarusos": "Rashi explains that it is d'rabanan that they made a gezera on yichud with an unmarried woman, and even an arusah was not allowed until she enters the chupah with a bracha, as it says, 'A kallah without a bracha is assur to her husband like a nidah.' And even though this issur is mid'rabanan, one needs to say a bracha on it just like we say a bracha on Ner Chanukah and Mikra Megilah which are mid'rabanan...."

Others dispute this, but at least my thoughts were not unfounded. Baruch Shekivanti.

Akiva Miller

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