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          <h1 data-post-id="7632" style="margin:0 0 12px;mso-ansi-font-size:40px;color:#111111;font-family:'merriweather sans','helvetica neue',helvetica,arial,sans-serif;font-size:40px;line-height:64px;mso-line-height-alt:64px;margin-bottom:0;text-align:left;padding:0;font-style:normal;font-weight:normal">Tefillah Thought: Satisfy us with Your Good, and Gladden us through Your Salvation</h1>
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            Author: Micha Berger<br /><br />
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            <em>(This post makes it a </em>chazaqah <em>of sharing these "Tefillah Thoughts", thoughts that have become central parts of my own davening. Shorter in format than other posts have been. Not all of them are well-founded. Just sharing ideas that have become important and meaningful to me as I say the words in the Siddur. You can decide for yourself if they add meaning to your own davening, or if you just aren't as convinced as I am.)</em><br /><br />
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            Until now this series looked at <em>Birkhas Avos</em>, the first <em>berakhah</em> of Shemoneh<em> </em>Esrei. This post will get there too, but first a detour into the <em>Admidah</em> for Shabbos and Yom Tov.
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                  קַדְּשֵׁנוּ בְּמִצְוֹתֶיךָ / וְתֵן חֶלְקֵנוּ בְּתוֹרָתֶךָ<br />שַׂבְּעֵנוּ מִטּוּבֶךָ / וְשַׂמְּחֵנוּ בִּישׁוּעָתֶךָ<br />... sanctify us through Your mitzvos / and give us our portion in Your Torah<br />satisfy us with Your Good / and makes us happy through Your redemption.
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            Tangent: Note the change of prepositional prefix. When it comes to Hashem's Torah, mitzvos, and salvation, the preposition is -ב, meaning via or in. But when it comes to Hashem's Good, the preposition is -מ, in. We are asking for more mitzvos, more Torah and more salvation so that we can get more holiness, a bigger portion in life, and more happiness. But when it comes to His Good, we aren't asking for more good as a means to get satisfied, but directly asking for more satisfaction. I think the reason is that we cannot ask for more Divine Good; Hashem isn't holding back any. Even if at times that Good is in ways we don't feel. What we are saying is:<br /><br />
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            "Hashem, give us more sanctity by leading me to more mitvos, give us our full portion in life through making Your Torah more available. Make us satisfied -- by not by using Your Good to do so, but satisfaction with the Good that's already there, and make us happy by providing more redemption.
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                  But back to my originally intended topic...
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            There is something of a conflict between<em> Tuvekha</em> - Your Good, and <em>Yeshu'asekha</em> - Your salvation. If everything were going well, we wouldn't need saving.<br /><br />
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            We see the same dichotomy repeatedly in <em>Birkhas Avos</em>:<br />
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<li class="mailpoet_paragraph" style="mso-ansi-font-size:16px;color:#000000;font-family:'source sans pro','helvetica neue',helvetica,arial,sans-serif;font-size:15px;line-height:24px;mso-line-height-alt:24px;text-align:left;margin-bottom:10px">"<em>Hashem Elokeinu</em>" - we go from the name that the Torah uses when G-d appears to be acting from Compassion, to the name used when it looks like He is coming from strict Justice.</li>
<li class="mailpoet_paragraph" style="mso-ansi-font-size:16px;color:#000000;font-family:'source sans pro','helvetica neue',helvetica,arial,sans-serif;font-size:15px;line-height:24px;mso-line-height-alt:24px;text-align:left;margin-bottom:10px">"<em>HaGadol vehaGibbor</em> -- the Great and the Strong" - where <em>Gadol </em>talks about Hashem's Omnipresence, (literally: the Large) and <em>gevurah</em> refers to the strength to hold steadfast. Available vs. Restraint.</li>
<li class="mailpoet_paragraph" style="mso-ansi-font-size:16px;color:#000000;font-family:'source sans pro','helvetica neue',helvetica,arial,sans-serif;font-size:15px;line-height:24px;mso-line-height-alt:24px;text-align:left;margin-bottom:10px">"<em>Gomeil Chassadim Tovim veQoneih haKol</em>", "Who supports us with instances of Lovingkindness that are good", and yet, the Gra explains the second half as "and the Repairer of everything." <em>Qoneih</em> is the Maker and consequently the Owner, but the same root is used for <em>letaqein</em>, to fix. Which, is, after all, a kind of re-making, and the owner's responsibility. Think of "<em>lesaqein olam</em>".</li>
<li class="mailpoet_paragraph" style="mso-ansi-font-size:16px;color:#000000;font-family:'source sans pro','helvetica neue',helvetica,arial,sans-serif;font-size:15px;line-height:24px;mso-line-height-alt:24px;text-align:left;margin-bottom:10px">"<em>Ozeir uMoshia</em> -- Helper and Savior" -- but if Hashem were helping us to begin with, how do we end up in a mess that requires our being bailed out?</li>
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            I think the key is in "<em>Chassadim Tovim</em> - good instances of Lovingkindness"? When is lovingkindness not good? When it smothers. The role of <em>gevurah</em> is to stand back and give the other person room to be. <em>Gevurah</em> is the parent who holds back from holding their toddler's hand. Even though it means they will likely land on their bum a few times. Because it is the only way they'll ever learn to walk on their own.<br /><br />
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            Because sometimes letting the other get into a mess once in a while is the only way that person gets to be a person, a contributor to the welfare of the universe, rather than your puppet.<br /><br />
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            And so, the Creator as Elokim, the G-d of Justice, of setting up the rules by which the universe operates and the rules which we ought to follow, is a more subtle expression of G-d as Hashem, the Compassionate. The G-d who is Gadol enough to always be around, but Gibbor enough not to force it. Helping and Saving.<br /><br />
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            And we need both <em>Tuvekha </em>and <em>Yeshu'asekha</em> -- a balance of receiving His Good and of being a doer who can mess up, and needs saving. Because that too is a good we can get.<br /><br />
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            In real life, personalizing this philosophizing a bit, there are the good times and the bad, the times I can feel thankful for Hashem's Good and times I pray for His Help. And I need to be able to turn to Him in both circumstances, not forgetting Who enabled things to go well, and not despairing of His assistance when things look bleak.<br /><br />
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            Birkhas Avos, with that theme of the various kinds of relationship with G-d our Avos modeled for us, shows the complexity and multiple aspects of the relationship on this axis as well.<br /><br />
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